Gravity Falls Incorrect Quotes - Blog Posts

Bill: "Yo. I've been talking to Ford for a couple of weeks, and I think I'm ready to ask him out."

Fiddleford: "I mean, yeah, that's cool that you wanna go out with him, but I heard that he only likes guys with blonde hair, like—"

*He blinks and all of a sudden Bill is a guy with extremely blonde hair*

Fiddleford: "..."

Fiddleford: "Bro..."

Bill: "I'm — I'm just chilling."

Fiddleford: "Bill, how are you gonna change your entire self...for a guy, bro—"

Bill: "Bro..."

*Bill taps the southern man on the shoulder and points into the distance where Stan is walking up next to Ford*

Bill: "He has a twin...brother."

*Fiddleford now has hair so blonde and bright that it's capable of blinding the eyes of passerby*

...

Fiddleford: "See, that's a different story."

Bill: "That's what I'm trying to say!"

The Axolotl: "Now, there'll be no more interruptions, distractions, or side plots. Bill Cipher, is there anything further you'd like to say to the Court?"

*A piano, which was notably not there beforehand, is present with Bill sitting on its bench. He flexes his fingers before drifting them towards the white-and-black keys, playing the opening notes of a tune. He then turns to face the great amphibian expectantly*

The Axolotl: "Not in the form of a song."

*Bill's eye twitches in annoyance for a moment and he closes it to gain composure before opening it back up*

Bill: "I'm innocent."

The Axolotl: "Very well."

*They move to face the jury, opening their mouth for a second to speak before being immediately interrupted by a certain triangle continuing his statement while playing a melody on the piano*

Bill: "I'm so incredibly innocent that the word 'innocent ' should be written on my face. The 'i' would stand for 'I'm innocent.' The 'n' would stand for 'nothing wrong,' which is what I've done. The 'a' would stand for—"

Ford: "That's not how you spell 'innocent.'"

Bill: "I'm sure spelling doesn't count."

The Axolotl: "Spelling counts."

*Bill's eye scrunches in annoyance at the frilled god and he does his best to side-eye them with his singular eye before placing focus back on his piano*

Bill: "Well, then 'innocent' should be spelled 'B-I-L-L' because that is how I plead!"

*The keys got louder with the pronunciation of each letter and he finished off with a selection of sweet notes, nodding in showmanship*

(Incorrect Quote sourced from the episode "Penultimate Peril: Part 2" of the show "A Series of Unfortunate Events".)

"Is this about the children? I apologize for the noise. I told them to cry using their inside voices."

—Filbrick Pines, probably

(Incorrect Quote sourced from the episode "The Bad Beginning" of the TV show "A Series of Unfortunate Events".)

"Girls were falling all over me in school, and not just because I would extend my leg when they walked by. I was a lone wolf, a mysterious stranger, a regular client at the hospital."

-Bill Cipher, probably

(Incorrect Quote sourced from the episode "The Austere Academy" of the TV show "A Series of Unfortunate Events".)

*Ford and Stan open the door to the Mystery Shack and step outside, exiting it*

Ford: "Now, all that stands between us and enjoying ourselves is—"

Bill: "YOUR OL' PAL AND OVERLORD, BILL CIPHER! MUAHAHAHA!"

*Ford flinches back as Bill shoves his face into his personal space, one hand of his grasping a flashlight which he flickers on-and-off as the other one waves up and down; gesturing madly*

Bill: "Zzzz—eerrk! Lightning! HAHAHA! "

*The flashlight then flickers off...permanently...leaving Bill to shake it furiously. The Axolotl walks up from behind him, wearing a white lab coat*

The Axolotl: "I cut his dramatic-entrance budget."

(Incorrect Quote sourced from the episode "Raiders of the Doomsday Vault!" of the series "Ducktales (2017)".)

Bill: "My boyfriend is wearing a freaking suit for his autism diagnosis appointment."

Ford: "It's a special event!"

Bill: "Shut up."

Bill: "So, Frills, just wanted to double check. How do ethical beings feel about murder?"

The Axolotl: "It's frowned upon."

(Incorrect Quote sourced from the episode "Derek" of the series "The Good Place".)

(Credit for the amazing artwork and AU goes to @fazfuri )

(All credit for the AU and artwork used go to @fazfuri )

—This is an attempt to get the panels in order—

(All credit for the AU and artwork used go to @fazfuri )

—This is an attempt to get the panels in order. Click on the "#stars falls x my clematis" tag on my tumblr blog to find the finished version I reblogged with the rest of the panels included—

Mr. Ford Pines: "Do you believe in god?"

Deity Bill: "No! Stop talking."

Mr. Ford: "Once upon a time, mankind believed in god and had religion."

Deity: *sighs*

Mr. Ford: "They believed that things that cannot be solved by human strength are the will of god; believed that the entire universe revolved around the Earth; thought that the place that connected with the sky, which they could not dare to reach, was the place where the gods lived."

Deity: "That's just ridiculous."

Mr. Ford: "From the moment humanity left the universe, we all forgot god."

...

Mr. Ford: "But if belief in god is human. If all I can do as a human is to believe–"

Deity: "Why are you staring at me? "

Mr. Ford: "My god..."

Deity: "Hey — hey! Wait! "

Mr. Ford: "...My universe."

Deity: "Ah, go away! Ahhhh! "

("Star Falls" AU and artwork featured are created by @fazfuri )

(Incorrect Quote sourced from the Alien Stage Ivan & Till cover of the song "My Clematis".)

!!Check out my reblogged post of the one I made that came after this one, if you want to see the full panels in order!!

*Upon the Pines family finding out that, somehow, someone stole from the Mystery Shack*

Mabel: "You know, I'm suprised we haven't heard from Grunkle St—"

*She's interrupted by Stanley all of sudden bursting into the room*

Stan: "WE'VE BEEN ROBBED?! Oh, the humanity! Give it to me straight, Sixer. How much did I — uh — we — uh — you lose?"

(Incorrect Quote sourced from the episode "The 87 Cent Solution" of the series "Ducktales (2017)".)

"I am the monster, rawr, rawr, rawr! "

-Bill Cipher after the Euclidean Massacre

(Incorrect Quote sourced from an april fools prank song by Jorge-Riverra-Herrans for EPIC: The Musical)

This is canon. It happened while they were sailing around the world together. The only person who can dispute this is Alex Hirsch himself.

(For @romanticizing-writing)

Stan: AHHH! I ain’t too worried about it! (Gasping) 😰

Ford: You had that dream again, didn’t you? 😒

*The Pines Family (and Bill) are gathered together in the Mystery Shack's living room as Mabel attempts to teach a lesson about ethics using the infamous trolley problem. Bill is fixated on doodling on the paper he's holding*

Mabel: "Bill. You've been quiet. What do you think about this?"

Handyman Bill: "Well, obviously the dilemma is clear: How do you kill all six people?"

*He turns the paper he was drawing on around, so that the Pines can see it properly. It's a vivid depiction of bloodshed and massacre utilizing creative methods that only a psychopath could think of...which he is. Sparkly, red glitter is glued on to color and illustrate the blood rushing from the victims' wounds*

Bill: "Well, I would dangle a sharp blade out of a window to slice the neck of the guy on the other track as we swoosh our five main guys."

*He looks around expectantly only to be met with tired expressions, too used to this kind of mayhem*

Bill: "Oh... I did the thing again, didn't I?"

Mabel: "Yeah. Ten more more, buddy."

*She flips around the blackboard she had borrowed from Ford to use for her lesson to reveal hundreds of "People=Good" messages scribbled on the other side in chalk*

Bill: "People. Good. People... Why is that so hard to remember? "

(The "Handyman Bill AU" was created by @/LosanPostle and @/waty_mot on Twitter)

(Incorrect Quote sourced from the episode "The Trolley Problem" of the series "The Good Place".)

Stan: "But nothing scares me anymore."

Ford: "Not even Bill?"

Stan: "When was the last time we even saw that guy? I guess you could say I ain't too worried about it. You should give it a shot! Feels pretty good."

Ford: ...

Ford: "'I'm not too worried about it..?'"

(Thank you @gemwing1988 for giving me the inspiration for this)

(Incorrect Quote sourced from the episode "Release the Demons" of the series "The Cuphead Show".)

Simple Bill: "Does your mommy know that you eat all that stuff?"

Megalomaniac Ford: "Not anymore!"

MM!Ford: "When mom was alive—"

(AU and artwork used created by @orxinus )

(Incorrect Quote sourced from "Heathers the Musical".)

Bill: "Make a deal with me, and I'll give you ten bucks~!"

Stan: "Oh, boy! Ten bucks!"

Ford: "No, Stan! Your soul is worth more than ten bucks."

Stan: "Hey, you're right!"

...

Stan: "Make it twenty."

(Incorrect Quote is sourced from the episode "Sweater Off Dead" of the series "The Cuphead Show".)

"Now, if you don't mind, I'm going to bed before you come up with another clever idea to get us killed, or worse — expelled!"

— A teenage Stanford Filbrick Pines, probably

(Incorrect Quote sourced from the book "Harry Potter and the Philosopher's/Sorcerer's Stone".)

*Bill floats beside Ford, whom is suspended in the air by blue chains, and places his hand on the edge of one of his bricks. He then extends it out from his body and takes out a pile of notecards from within it — as if the brick was merely an open drawer rather an actual part of himself*

Bill: "Now, the revenge monologue I've been plotting for thirty years: 'To my most hated nemesis...' That's you. '...As you know, you kept trapped me within the Nightmare Realm by refusing to open the portal, where I've been biding my time, devising your delicious downfall. In conclusion—'"

*Bill cuts off unexpectedly, squinting his eye down at the cards as he shuffles through them. Ford watches with the most deadpan face*

Bill: "Wait. These are out of order. Hold on. Hold on! Don't roll your eye at me! I'VE BEEN TRAPPED FOR THIRTY YEARS! I'm entitled to a full minute of gloating! I will make you watch as I destroy everything you've ever loved, starting with your precious little town!"

Bill: ...

Ford: ...

Bill: "Ooh, that's good. Got a pen?"

(Incorrect Quote sourced from the episode "The Shadow War Part ||: The Day of the Ducks!" of the Disney series "Ducktales (2017)".)

Bill Cipher: "Did you know you talk in your sleep? Tell me, though, who's 'Fiddleford'?"

Ford: "He's my closest friend."

...

Bill: "ANYWAYS—"

(Incorrect Quote sourced from the EPIC song "Love in Paradise")

Wendy: "You didn't tell your grunkle you were going to a dangerous, underground bunker, did you?"

Dipper: "I kinda, sorta didn't tell him...anything."

Wendy: "Dipper! That's irresponsible! He'll be worried sick. Call your grunkle this instant and tell him that you are spending the night at a friend's house, okay?"

*Hands him her phone while winking with one eye*

Wendy: "Lying: It's the responsible thing to do."

(Incorrect Quote sourced from the episode "Escape To/From Atlantis!" of the Disney series "Ducktales (2017)".)

Ford: "Stanley, since I left home, I've faced a variety of foes from a wide range of places. Anomalies, monsters, you know the roster — hostile creatures that I could resist. But this was a heck of a twist, 'cause we are weak to a power like this!"

Stan: "What was it?"

Ford: "A triangle."

...

Stan: "What? "

(Incorrect quote sourced from the EPIC song "Puppeteer")

Stanford Pines: "Life lesson, kids: adventuring is tough. Ya know, sometimes there's a cursed muse that turns out to be a demon."

*Attempts to fix an issue with the Quantum Destabilizer with a tool*

"Or sometimes you get sucked into a portal and TRY to stay alive, but a one-eyed triangle messes EVERYTHING up, keeping you here while your grand-niece and nephew grow up with their grand-uncles—"

*The tool snaps in half from the fast, tense movements, and he grits his teeth; holding the object up to inspect it disapprovingly*

"But you still got your health, a 'cool' metal plate, and tattoos that mock you every time you dare to undress!"

(Incorrect Quote sourced from the episode "What Ever Happened to Della Duck?!" of the Disney series "Ducktales (2017)".)

*Meanwhile again in the theraprism*

Bill: relax they won’t even realize that we had it we were done.

The core: done with what?

Bill: you guys did bring the supplies right?

Absolute solver: yeah fo— you brought us to make COSMIC DUST!?!

Bill: yeah, what else are meteor fragments for?

The core: oh we don’t know bill maybe ARTS & CRAFTS

*Meanwhile in the theraprism*

Absolute solver: so how did you guys end up here?

Bill: defeated by some kids a thousand years ago

Belos & the core: ditto

Absolute solver: …by any chance did they have a weird girl, an idiot or a trained soldier?

Eyeball trio:…

The core: you have got to be kidding us

Belos:*sigh* titan why

Bill: do weird uncles count?

Bill: hi! it’s me! I’m not dead! which is an awful surprise considering how many people wrote my obituary! preemptively in case I did die! But I didn’t! So suck on that!

Something me and my brother were talking about as a GF incorrect quote

*They’re all talking about if they had one wish, what they’d wish for.*

Mabel: I know it may be cliche but… I’d wish for a world where everyone respects each other and helped each other instead of talking each other down and hurting each other. Stanley: That’s a nice wish. Anyways I’d wish for 100 million-